Commiserate -- empathize -- sympathize -- identify with? I wonder if, before I was a stay-at-home mom, I ever asked a woman who I suspected stayed home if she "WORKED"? If I ever asked a woman that question I am truly sorry! I was an idiot who didn't know what a stay-at-home mom does.
Most days I go along fine handling -- and LOVING -- all of the challenges and demands of home and kids, so please don't judge me harshly. I am immensely grateful for the opportunity to be at home with my girls every day -- to teach them and help them and watch them learn and grow. I didn't have this opportunity with my son, so I am very aware of what a blessing it is.
But, honestly, some days I would love to lock myself in the laundry room (never mind, I would have to look at the laundry I need to do) for about fifteen minutes. Heck, doesn't some federal law guarantee all workers the right to two 15-minute breaks and a 30-minute lunch break if they work eight hours?
Case in point, this morning I just about went over the brink to insanity when I couldn't even CUT MY TOENAILS without one of the kids needing something from me. I think if I had the federally-guaranteed 15-minute break I'd use it for that...cutting my toenails in peace.
OK, better go...someone is calling "mamma" again. Thanks for listening. I feel better now.
Old Faithful!! Jada Pinkett
5 years ago
5 comments:
You are such a WONDERFUL mom! I only have one son, and sometimes I feel like that..."Someone just take him for five mins! I NEED A BREAK!" LOL! Stay-at-home Mom's really SHOULD be granted 15 minuet breaks! It should be law. :D I am lucky though...my little guy still takes naps!;) Let's hope that lasts for a while more. I LOVE NAP TIME! :D
I think it really takes courage to say, "Just a minuet. Mommy is busy" or "It is Mommys time for Mommy right now. Wait for a minuet." We think we are "bad" if we say that, or we don't run to our children every time they want to show us something. But it is important to take time (even two seconds to cut our toe nails!) for ourselves! It reminds us that we are important, too, and it also teaches our children that everyone is important and everyone sometimes needs time to themselves. (Okay, when social welfare shows up at my door, you will know to disregard what I just said! LOL!)
Okay, enough of me talking...like you have time to read a 12 page post! Go cut your toe nails!
Sending love your way,
Brec
Thanks, Brec! That's just what I needed! You're the best! :-) And I did say no today when Elizabeth came to get me for about the fourth time to show me she got another puzzle piece. I told her she's doing great and I'll come and look when she gets all the pieces done.
I actually HAVE locked myself in the laundry room to get some peace and quiet. :-) Totally normal way to feel. But Brec is right - we need to teach our children some realistic boundaries as well. Especially as they get to an age where they can do more for themselves, etc.
It is perfectly acceptable, even good, for them to hear you say. "Right now mommy is doing X. I'll come help you in a minute."
This weekend I was so engrossed in a book that I spent about 2 hours glued to a chair. The kids would wander in, look at all the pages still to go, sigh, ask me how long I was going to read and then leave. I did finally put it down and we headed to the park.
P.S. I'm a big believer in mom's night out as well. Grab a girlfriend and have dinner or coffee a couple times a month. Even if it's after the kids are all in bed!
Oh, Rebecca, I so know what you're talking about. At least, now I get a little bit of a break with the boys being at school. But when I'm home with them due to school being out or summer vacation, I can truely relate. And, I think I too, had the idea of "what do stay-at-home moms do anyway....that's not work". Boy, was I wrong!! It's the hardest and most demanding job anyone could have. No, you may not be heading up meetings, or adjusting budgets, or conferencing in with some international "big-wig" but it is an important and hard job just the same and takes a lot more organization and patience than most top execs can brag about.
You're doing a great job. And you have a wonderful husband that gives you that "mommy time" to herself that is SO IMPORTANT. You have to take care of yourself first or there won't be a mommy to take care of your girls. No what I mean. Love you and you know I'm only a phone call away, girl!
My sister has five children, ages 14-24. Whenever anyone asked me if she worked, I always replied "Outside of the home? No, I think one full-time job is enough, don't you?"
Do not feel guilty for needing five minutes to cut your toenails. Let your husband know that a certificate to the salon for a pedicure would be two gifts in one, a little time to yourself, and trimmed toenails! :-)
Hang in there and don't beat yourself up about what you need.
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